16 Wednesday May 2012
Posted in Reviews, Uncategorized
Tags
australian fantasy author, book thingo, Denise Rossetti, destiny of the light, fantasy, Juliet Marillier, Kylie Griffin, Louise Cusack, review, vodcast
I’m so very pleased to have been included in a list of Aussie fantasy authors reviewed by the ladies at Book Thingo. Their VODCAST is here:
To see the accompanying Book Thingo article click here.
25 Wednesday Apr 2012
Posted in Inspiration, Uncategorized
Tags
ANZAC, ANZAC Day, characters, Father, Fathers, forgiveness, inspiration, Thank you, writing
My dad died twenty-five years ago, and although from the age of ten I never got on with him, he was probably a normal sort of guy. He grew up in Brisbane through the depression, and with a no-good alcoholic father, he was hungry a lot. Not surprisingly, he put his age up to serve in the war in New Guinea, at Milne Bay in fact. He was a bit of a tearaway according to his war record, and was disciplined a number of times before he was sent north to fight. Unfortunately five weeks into his active service a grenade went off near him and shrapnel lodged in his back. He was operated on (none too successfully) in Townsville and repatriated to the Military Convalescent Camp at Tallebudgera on the Gold Coast.
When his wounds were healed he became a driver at the camp and spent the rest of the war there. Some time later while roaring around on a motorcycle wearing a leather jacket (and no doubt thinking he looked cool) he met an innocent young farm girl from west of Rockhampton whose family had just moved to Brisbane. They got married and had four children (I was the third). Dad’s trade was carpentry, but unfortunately his back was never right and there were stretches while I was growing up when he was in Greenslopes Repatriation Hospital. He lived long enough to see me get married, but died of renal cancer before my children were born.
As I said, we never got on. Nothing melodramatic. We were just two people who seemed destined to argue over everything. Then he got sick a couple of years after I got married, and when he died I didn’t cry. I was too busy organising the funeral and thereafter being busy. It was several years before it caught up with me (perhaps some denial there, I’ll allow). I was attending the Brisbane Writers Festival. I remember it was Father’s Day, which meant nothing to me as there were no fathers left in our families and my husband and I hadn’t had children yet. But the panel I remember attending that day was called “Fathers, Absent and Present”. John Birmingham and Gary Crew were speakers, and I remember Stephen Cummings was another. I’m sorry now that I can’t remember the fourth, but what I do remember is their honesty. Instead of talking about their books, they each spoke quite emotionally about their relationships with their fathers. Some had fabulous memories, and their dads were in the audience. One had a tragic childhood of neglect and emotional torment, but as a whole the panel was painful and poignant and perfectly fitting for Fathers Day.
I thought all this on an intellectual level while I walked to the festival coffee shop, paid for coffee and cake and settled myself into a table overlooking the beautiful Brisbane River. The next thing I remember is sobbing, quite loudly and uncontrollably. Big wrenching, painful sobs that pulled my lungs up into my throat and burned them there. On one level I was aware of embarrassing myself, but there was nothing I could do to stop it. So I turned away from everyone else and let it run it’s course. By the time it was over and I had my breathing back under control the tables around me were empty, either out of sympathy or perhaps more likely because another session had started.
I don’t know what that was. Still. But from that moment on, my annual tradition of attending the ANZAC Day Dawn Service changed (pic on left is of me at the Canberra War Memorial, having snuck out of Conjure with Jason Nahrung and a few mates to attend). Instead of it being only about respecting those who gave their lives to ensure I grew up in a free country, somehow ANZAC Day became the one day I could freely ‘chat’ with my dad. At first it was just “So I hope there are lots of people in heaven to criticise. Wouldn’t want you to get rusty,” but I have to admit that over time the bitterness started to shift.
During that period my inner life was obviously being projected onto my writing. Fathers were either absent, ineffectual or downright obstructive in my stories. I couldn’t seem to write about a father who was helpful! In any way. But as time went by and I attended ANZAC services in so many different places, surrounded by so many different people – seeing men who had been shaped by an experience I could never understand – my conversations with dad started to shift. Instead of bitching I’d remember times when I was little and he’d carried me into the surf and kept me safe in his arms above the waves, or sitting on his lap reciting nursery rhymes and feeling very clever, dancing to ‘Teddy Bear’s Picnic’ while my mum played the piano. All memories from when I was small, when I was too young to realise I didn’t agree with him, and to say so. But somehow those memories cracked a kernel of tenderness that I hadn’t imagined could ever exist between my father and I.
It was just once a year, just on that one day, but it must have done something because this year, amazingly (and I didn’t realise I was doing it until I was finished) I wrote a father who was terrible to his daughter, but on his deathbed he explained that everything he’d done was out of love, to create a ruse that had protected her from danger and strengthened her to step into his shoes and rule the kingdom in her own right.
To say I was taken completely by surprise would be an understatement. I’d hated that king from the moment he’d stepped onto the page, and I thought his daughter deserved so much better, but when I looked at the story I’d written I realised that he’d been right. Everything he’d done had made her stronger, smarter, safer, and he had the perfect motivation to keep his love from her, for her own good.
Amazingly, she forgave him. I tried to make her bitter, but characters have a life of their own and she wouldn’t do it. She was so much braver than me, and though these people I’ve created in my stories aren’t real, their honesty and their acceptance inspires me to be better than I am.
So now it’s ANZAC Day 2012 and my dad has been gone more years than he was with me growing up. I’ve attended the Dawn Service at a submarine lookout on the Coral Sea, with the waves crashing onto volcanic rocks below, and for the very first time I’ve found it within myself to say “Thank you,“ to my father, and to mean it, and I know it’s changed me profoundly.
Even more amazing, this year, for the first time, my dad answered back. One word. Clear as a bell inside my mind.
Live
I don’t know exactly what he means by that, but I know what I plan to do with it. My kingdom is in front of me. It’s my show now. I plan to be brave.
I wonder, what did your father teach you…?
17 Tuesday Apr 2012
Posted in Guest blogs
Tags
books, Bundaberg, characterisation, characters, country characters, funeral home, guest blog, Writefest
Am over on YA author Cheryse Durrant’s blog today talking about how my characters are inspired by real life people, and also about the Writefest Masterclass I’m tutoring in Bundaberg in May. Pop on over!
16 Monday Apr 2012
Posted in Uncategorized
Very excited about the fact that my blog has been nominated in the “Best Australian Blogs 2012″ competition. If you like my blog and want to vote for me, please click on the button and look for Louise Cusack in the list.
If you want to be my new best friend, you can also tweet or Facebook the link and ask others to vote for my blog too.
Thanks!
11 Wednesday Apr 2012
Posted in Reading
Tags
#thanks4theread, books, call centre, grateful, gratitude, reading, Rhonda Byrne, Telstra, The Magic
I had an odd experience last night. It started with a Telstra problem (which admittedly isn’t odd at all) but it developed after I rang their 24hr helpline at 10pm.
By midnight I was onto my 9th Telstra employee – Ahmed in the Adelaide call centre – who also wanted to transfer me to someone else to sort my problem. Again, nothing unusual there. It seems to be the thing with call centres. If your problem is at all challenging, the easy road seems to be redirection: “Oh you’re a business customer. This is residential,” or “Sorry, they’ve transferred you to IT support, you want IP support.” Etc. Etc.
Anyway, by the time I’d reached Ahmed I was low on reserves. I’d spent two hours being shunted from one unhelpful person to the next, and while listening to piped music I’d been stressing about how I could run a business when I couldn’t email my customers. Only certain customers, admittedly, but you know how situations always seem more dire after midnight. I think there’s some Universal Law at work with that.
So when Ahmed wanted to transfer me back to the 125111 helpline I’d been sent to three times already, I just couldn’t take it anymore. I’m ashamed to admit that I begged. I told him I knew call centre staff had time restrictions on calls, and that it wasn’t his fault that someone had transferred me to the wrong place, but could he please, please, please take the time to find the right person for me before he transferred me through. Ahmed was clearly an intelligent guy and he’d understood my problem, so I was counting on him also knowing the sections of Telstra (sprawled across several continents) and being able to find the needle in a haystack that I wanted.
And God help me he did.
I sat quietly listening to piped music for fifteen minutes while he burned off his call average for the night searching for someone to help me. Then he came back on and apologised for making me wait. I swear, I wanted to reach through the phone and kiss him! He transferred me to Dimple in the Philippines who understood exactly what I was talking about, and through a process of elimination over the next two hours she found my problem and fixed it. I feel like an idiot, but I’m crying now as I write this because I was so happy, and so relieved. I didn’t want to be one of those people who complains about call centres all the time. I wanted to be someone who gets looked after well and feels grateful for that. And I was. At 2:30am when I went to bed, everything was right with my world.
This morning (after a good sleep in) I did my usual routine of spending time with my gratitude journal. I’m currently working my way through the new book by Rhonda Byrne (of The Secret fame) called The Magic. Part of that program is writing ten things you’re grateful for, and adding why they make you feel good. Ahmed and Dimple were top of my list, and having a working email system (which I’d previously taken for granted) came in close second. Last night I’d gone to the Telstra ‘positive feedback’ website and detailed how much I’d appreciated Ahmed and Dimple, and in the light of a new day today (and a more awake brain) it occurred to me that there are lots of things I appreciate as passionately as I did their help last night, which I never take the time to acknowledge.
And high on the list is books.
Admittedly I’d done the odd review when I happened to be online, but only when it was convenient to me. I’d never gone out of my way to show my appreciation for reading, which is crazy because my love of books is one of my big passions in life. And how hard would it be to pop into Amazon and leave a review under the book I’d just read, and to add a review in Goodreads? Saying Thank you makes me feel good, and because I wasn’t in the habit of saying Thank you to other authors for the time and effort they’d put into their stories, I was missing out on precious feel-good emotions.
But now, thanks to Ahmed and his inspiration, I won’t miss out. I’m going to make sure that when I finish reading a book I Tweet, Facebook, Amazon Review and Goodreads review the book, because that’s the least I can do to show how grateful I am for the pleasure of reading someone else’s carefully chosen words.
If you love books too, think about getting onboard with #thanks4theread and let’s see if we can trend it! There really can’t be enough gratitude in the world, so let’s start with something we all love.
06 Friday Apr 2012
Posted in Guest blogs
Tags
blog, books, destiny of the light, fantasy, free, free ebook, personal, romance, Shadow through time, vegetarian, world building, writing
Today I’m at Mission Romance talking All Things Fantastical, describing how my Shadow Through Time trilogy world-building was inspired by something quite personal to me (but not anymore!). Do pop in and comment so you’re in the draw to win a free ebook of Destiny of the Light.
23 Friday Mar 2012
Posted in Guest blogs, Reviews
Tags
A Princess of Mars, book review, books, champion, edgar rice burroughs, fantasy, john carter, otherworld, romance, vegetarian
I’m at the Darkside DownUnder website today with a book review of one of my all-time favourites. I’ve just re-read A Princess of Mars prior to watching the Disney movie it inspired: John Carter. As a teenager I devoured the Edgar Rice Burroughs Barsoom series featuring the Earthman John Carter and his Martian princess Dejah Thoris, and you’ll be surprised at how romantic they are. Enjoy!
15 Thursday Mar 2012
Posted in Guest blogs
Tags
destiny of the light, ebook, fantasy, giveaway, seat of the pants, vegetarian, world building, writer, writing
I’m giving away an ebook of Destiny of the Light to one commenter on the Dark Side Downunder Magic Thursday blog. Do pop over if you’ve got a minute. You’ll learn about the worldbuilding consequences of being a vegetarian and a seat-of-the-pants fantasy writer!
13 Tuesday Mar 2012
Posted in Guest blogs
Tags
alice in wonderland, da vinci, destiny of the light, dune, eBooks, fantasy, influences, inspiration, john carter, Left Hand of Darkness, romance, romantic fantasy, Shadow through time, trilogy, writing
Patrick O’Duffy has interviewed me on his blog today, about ebooks, fantastic romance, my influences and inspirations, and John Carter of Mars. Pop over and say Hi!
08 Thursday Mar 2012
Posted in Guest blogs
Tags
#AWW2012, Australian Women Writers Challenge, characters, guest blog, literature, Never Never, Sarah Connor, Shadow through time, women with fortitude
Today I’m at my publisher Momentum Books website blogging about ‘Women with Fortitude’ for International Women’s Day, and promoting the Australian Women Writers Reading and Reviewing Challenge. Do pop over and leave a comment. I’d love to hear who your favourite strong female character is and why.
